Saturday, October 26, 2013

Today's Blog Post: Look at the Bright Side

My kids just got home from their last game.

I thought last week was their last game, but apparently I was mistaken.  I'm so glad the season is over, I am ready for baseball or basketball or something other than football for them to play. I get lost watching them out on that field and I don't even understand the scoring system and calls they make.

Many moons ago I watched football. I watched it because I was single and wanted to be able to look semi-intelligent when it came to discussing sports with men. It worked once, and I remember watching football with this nice-looking guy I met where I lived back then and it led to some pretty fun times between he and I in the form of a few beers, rounds of darts and lots of cuddle time at his place and mine.

Gee I miss him. He was fun to hang around with. Wonder where he is now?

Sorry, I got sidetracked. 

Anyway, where was I? Oh yeah, football. So my kids are no longer playing football nor do they want to for the most part. They wanted to do baseball, but as soon as I told my youngest twin it's kid pitch he was a no go for baseball.

Dammit, I should have kept my mouth shut.
Oh well.

He might change his mind over the next couple of months.

I hope so anyway.

I managed to get some time to clean while the kids were at their game. Then I headed to the grocery store.  It was "Sample Saturday" there. I managed to get a very tasty cracker with some summer sausage and cheese. I asked the girl(who was probably about 19 or 20) what kind of cheese it was.  She smiled at me and told me " I don't know."  To which I smiled back at her and said "Well dammit you should know you work here."

NO I DIDN'T SAY THAT.

What I said was "that's alright, looks good though," as I grabbed a toothpick and helped myself to the nice little sample sitting before me on the tray. I set the toothpick on top of the container of strawberries I placed in the cart and a girl was walking around with some confectionery samples. I asked her what they were and again, she apparently didn't know either. "I think this is a cherry danish."  I recognized the other one, it was a snickerdoodle, I'd know that sucker a mile away. It was a whole cookie and I was tempted, but some little kid might like it instead.

So I snagged myself an "I think it's a Cherry Danish" sample and asked the girl "Are there any drinks around here? Cocktails perhaps?"

She laughed.

I walked away and said thanks.

Headed off to the meat department and they were giving away samples there too in little white cups, didn't know what they were though, because some woman needed help and he put the tray behind the counter and went to help her.

She couldn't wait just five seconds for me to hit the curve near the meat/seafood department could she?  

Like I needed more calories in my body anyway after all the sodium and carbs I just consumed.

(as if I actually watch those like the health nut I should be)

They also had a guy who was sampling some type of rigatoni and meat thingy. I forgot what it was. It looked good, but my mouth was so dry after that danish the thought of more meat combined with pasta in my mouth did not sound appealing, so I graciously smiled and declined his offer.

Some guy doing inventory/ordering said hello to me. Asked if I had found everything okay and I nodded and then said "Where are you hiding the peanut butter?" They rearranged the whole damn store and for the life of me I don't know why. I finally, after a year of shopping there knew where everything was and in the event my kids had a meltdown I could shop in 10 minutes or less and have half a cart of product. I was like those poor souls on Supermarket Sweep.  Remember that show? I do. Always wanted to be on it. They have a newer version of the same damn show, just renamed it. Kind of like how shampoo companies relabel their product.  It is supposedly a marketing technique.  It's still the same shitty shampoo, just with a prettier label.

Whatever.

So I run into the same guy four aisles later.  He greets me again, and I think he was aware that he greeted me already, but instead of me making some smart ass remark like "Did I age since aisle 1?" or "Haven't we met before?" I just told him I was fine and found everything okay. 

I actually was looking for pickles. One of my students brought these "pickle packs" in his lunch. I searched everywhere for those damn pickle packs(i.e individual packs of teeny weenie little pickles in a container like the Mott's Applesauce containers for kids). I couldn't find them. I even asked the produce guy. Bless his heart, poor fella went to the back and came out with a bag full of mini pickles that were much bigger than the pickles in my mind which I was looking for. Again, my sarcastic side bit it's tongue. I won't tell you what I was thinking.

Ran into (not literally) a woman I knew from the school my kids go to.  I haven't seen her in ages. At least a year.  Since I got this job of mine, I haven't seen much of anyone from the school anymore; friends included.

I was going down the baking aisle when I spotted her and I said "HI!" and I could tell that look she gave me. That was the look I gave a mom at my boys' party this month when she gave me the same "HI! How are you Barb?!" and my mind went blank who the hell she was. I knew her face, just forgot her name and whose kid was hers. I didn't pretend to know her, I admitted defeat and just politely told her "I'm sorry, I forgot your name." She laughed and said it's been a while, and yes I got her name.

So back to the grocery store story. I finally explained where I knew her from and told her my kids names and she remembered me. We chatted briefly and then I don't know why I do this, but to avoid embarrassment or awkward silence, as soon as I talk to someone I haven't seen for a while about a common topic that makes me open my mouth to begin with and say hello, I quickly end the conversation and hurry away.

That probably makes them wonder more than the awkward silence would.

I'm working on that.

So now I'm just about done. Dammit if only I had remembered my list. I left it on the couch. I need to remember to write a list to remember my list when I leave.

Or something like that.

*yeah, I know none of that made any sense...try and stay with me here*

I get to the counter and begin the daunting task of unloading. "Holy hell, there's going to be a lot of bags to carry up a flight of stairs to my second floor apartment", I thought to myself as I got to the bottom of the cart.

Usually I watch them ring up the items, but I have to say I like this store for the simple fact they are quick, friendly and efficient.

She picks up the strawberry container and says "I don't know what this is."

OOOPS! Remember that toothpick from the sample earlier? Still sitting on top of the strawberry container. I apologized and she smiled and said "No worries, I'll throw it away."

Yes, I know my mother doesn't work there.

I was tickled pink when I handed her my rewards card and I watched the total go from 91 dollars and some odd cents to 78 bucks. She was still scanning a few more items, but for what I spent I got a grub for my buck that's for sure. $118.00 was my total at the end of the bill. That includes three nights dinners, lunches for the kids school week, lunch for tomorrow and dinner for tomorrow night(pot roast...yummy).  And I bought healthy food. No chips, dips or anything that would be considered icky, err...umm...except the Nestle quick that was on sale. I've never seen it that cheap. $2.50. Had to buy it.

Impulse buy ya know?

I head to get some gas for my van so I don't have the Monday morning drama pit we always incur after the long weekend. Kids fighting, who sits where, peeling them out of bed in the first place just to get them dressed and in the van on time, it makes for a very stressful Monday. So when we have to stop for gas on the way to school and work, it's just a damn headache.

So I nixed that in the bud real quick.

There was this older gentleman in front of me. He was from New York.

How do I know this? You may ask yourself.

Well, he shared it with the cashier. An older gentleman himself as well, and straining to hear through the plate glass window and the shitty speakers they have that make "Have a nice day" sound like "H-uve N- ICE- ay" and you just grin and smile at the person on the other side of that window.  They may have called you an asshole, but you won't know. Ever.

So the old man from New York couldn't get his gas to pump and I let him cut in front of me to talk to the guy behind the window again because in all honesty where the hell did I need to be anyway?

Seriously.

I was in no hurry.

So this man is telling the guy behind the window he is going back home. He said he hates it here. I told that man(the New Yorker) I wish I could go back home and how I hate it here too.   He asked why I couldn't. Without telling him my whole life's story and the fact that telling him my whole life's story would probably send him to an early grave, I simply said "I have children and their dad lives here and I am stuck here for 8 1/2 more lovely years." He looks at me seriously and says "Oh?...Separated are ya?" Again, no details I just said yes. Then I told him to have a good safe trip.

Know what he said to me?

"I drove myself out here and I'll drive myself back."

Guessing he knows the travel Gods, or Oz, or God, or whomever his maker of choice may be has already cleared him for takeoff so to speak and he's guaranteed a safe travel.

****************************************

I'm driving home and  of course my day would not be complete without forgetting something.  Damn that list I forgot.

I forgot butter.

I needed that for baking. The kids and I and a few of their friends are going to decorate Halloween cookies. I needed butter!

So I run to a mini mart, a Walgreens and wouldn't you know it, all of them are out of butter. What the hell people? Are the cows on strike? Is butter back in style? I just needed one damn pack of butter.

You would think this would have ruined my day.

Not so fast.

It didn't.

I went home and of course there is no parking directly in front or anywhere near my building. I have to park across the lot. You would think this would be something bad as well.

Nope.

As I was unloading my groceries, one of my older neighbors, very pleasant gentleman who is always singing or whistling a song and manages to always shout out a hello even when I don't see him first, yells across the lot to me.

"Need some help there Barb!?!"

I really didn't want to impose. I said, "Umm...no..."

And before I could get another word out he says to me "It's no problem I'm standing here waiting on my carpet to get clean let me help you."

He moseys over to my van and the gentleman he was with(who has a cane!) asks if my neighbor needs help helping me. My neighbor says "No, I've got this." Next thing I know as I reach the top of my stairs with the 10 bags I piled on my arms, the man with the cane comes hobbling over to my van and picks up the (thankfully light)bags with the Little Debbie Snack Cakes and paper towels in them.  My other neighbor helps him helping me.

I thank them.

Then I head inside. 

I'm going to have to share some of those baked goods we make tonight with my neighbors.

I am blessed.

Whoever says I'm not...BITE YOUR TONGUE.

I may not have wealth, I may not have a sexy body anymore, I may not even have a boyfriend or a vehicle that is reliable, but it still gets me to where I need to be.

For that I am grateful.


I have amazing children, who are healthy. I have amazing neighbors, no doubt.  I have a roof over my head and food on the table. I have clothes on mine and my kids backs and birds who I can afford to feed and take care of that sing songs and talk to me and my children on lonely days(and not so lonely days).

I may have been dealt a shit hand in life some days. But when when days like today come around I can't do anything but smile.

Yes, I can turn a completely sarcastic and silly blog post into a philosophical thankful post.

I wouldn't be me if I didn't, right?





Tuesday, October 22, 2013

When Idiot Drivers Grace Our Roads

Hello Tuesday.

Please be better than yesterday at least while I'm driving on the road today.

Last night I was driving home singing along to the music on the radio(yes, I do that) when I look to my left and out of nowhere this silver four-door coupe is literally inches away from me. The idiot in the car is either a) drunk or b) texting or c) blindly unaware of his/her intent to enter my lane without permission. I quickly dart to the right in order to avoid a collision with this stupid driver's car and they just keep on going.

Then they go back into their lane, pass me up, and still have their blinker on. They are driving all over the road and I'm yelling at this person as though they could really hear me, "You stupid ass pay attention!"

What is wrong with people?

All day yesterday I was finding people who were driving like idiots.

On our way to work and school me and the kids had some idiot in a truck literally on my ass, had I needed to suddenly brake, he'd be eating a doughnut with my daughter in the back seat. I was glaring at him in my rear-view mirror talking to him like he could hear me too. "You better back off asshat, I have my kids in the van. Lay off the lead loser."  Apparently he heard me, because next thing I know he's slowing down and darts around me to the middle lane. I just stare at him. He races to the light, which was red anyway so I don't even know WHY he was in such a hurry to get there.  I pull up next to him and wanted to say "Are you happy you got to the red light first you moron? Was it worth jeopardizing the health and safety of my children because you didn't leave for work on time?"

Stupid drivers.

There's another guy on a cell phone texting or Facebooking or something.  He's oblivious to the road around him. As he starts to go his hands are still on the damn phone.  If I was in a vehicle with back windows that rolled down I would have pulled up next to him and had one of my kids grab his phone and tell him "It's illegal to use  your phone while driving in this state idiot, pay attention to the road."

Okay, not really, but that would be pretty funny if we had done it.

People, you need to leave in enough time to allow for traffic, pedestrians, accidents. If you leave late or hit an obstacle on the road along the way, simply drive at a safe and normal rate of speed to get where you are going.

You are already late.

You will get there when you get there.  Preferably in one piece along with the drivers around you.

Your job site is not moving. It will still be there when you arrive. No matter how late you are, it will still be there.  That pile of papers in your inbox will still be there. That construction job your working at won't magically disappear because you didn't get there at 8:30 on the dot. So you get there at 8:45, it's okay dude, relax, the cost of my life, my kids life or yours is not worth any stupid amount you get on a paycheck.

I've seen to many near misses on the road lately. I've been a victim of some of these near misses on the road.

I don't like it.  Especially when my precious cargo is buckled up in back.

If you choose to drive like an idiot let me be clear about one thing.

You better not harm ME or MY KIDS. I am a very protective mama bear with my cubs and you do not want the wrath of a pissed of Polack breathing down your neck.  If you were in the wrong, I will sue you. Unless you had some type of seizure or passed out from a stroke, I WILL sue you.  I will take your fancy toilet seat covers, your dog, your fish, and all the money your insurance company will part with on your behalf. Your insurance rates WILL go up, you will be forced to go to court, or even worse jail especially if your stupid ass was drunk when you hit me.

So just remember that the next time you hop in that big fancy truck of yours and turn the key.  If you don't want to lose what's important to you, then you better not mess with what's important to me....my kids safety.

Got that?!

Good.

Now stop reading this amazing blog and go get ready for work.

I don't want you to be late.




Saturday, October 19, 2013

An "Off Day" Off Day

I had a really off day today.

Literally and figuratively speaking.

I attended the last of my kids football games today. They lost. The refs totally sucked and made some really, really bad calls. I'm not just saying that because it was my kids' team that the calls were made on, the refs really must be blind and deaf.

At one point, they blew the whistle, the kids stopped running and the little squirt on the other team ran with the ball for a touchdown.

The other team got the points for that and the ref said that he never blew the whistle.

WTF?!!!

I have never witnessed a game where a child grabs another kid's helmet(known as "face mask" I believe?) in broad daylight and gets away with it.

What got me though was when our coach threw his drink on the field after the last play of the game, there was ice galore upon the turf.

What happened was this:

There was an injured player on our team and they stopped the clock(or were suppose to) and the mom carried the poor player off the field. Then when our kids got back out on the field they called time...game over.

We were sooooo close to the goal line.  About fifteen yards away to be honest.

They called the game!

All those poor kids out there crying, my boys included, I felt so bad for them.  Coach told them to stop crying because it's contagious. Told them they played "A hell of a game."  Not exactly the words I'd of used for children, but he had a point.

Then I got home and checked my mail.

Low and behold a summons for jury duty.

Can this day get any suckier?

No.

I won't let it.

It's 7:30 and I am just now finding some me time finally.

Truth be told, I wouldn't care about being called for jury duty. I watch enough crime shows to be intrigued with the real thing. Although if it's a murder or rape, I want no part of it.  T.V is one thing, it's not real, but real situations would make me ill to have to look at all those pictures and hear stories and confessions and what not.

Maybe it's some kid who stole gum from a convenience store at knife point and didn't harm anyone.

That I can handle.

On a positive note I did manage to get to watch some episodes of Vikings. It was the Viking marathon on the History channel. I love that show. Ragnar Lothbrook you are so yummy looking but you're a turd for cheating on your wife. Lagertha is going to kill you. You saw what she did to the earl's brother. I'd sleep with one eye open if I were you.

Shame on you.

Oooops...got carried away there talking to my imaginary tv friend Ragnar.

Anyway, looking forward to season 2 of the show. Can't wait.  I also can't believe Rollo is going to fight against his brother. Shame on you too dude.

Well, it is getting late and I'm rather hungry. I stayed away from the concession stand tonight and just brought two cokes and two bags of gummies that I shared with the kids on the team and my daughter's cheer friends. They were suppose to be good luck gummies, now I feel bad. Maybe they should have been given AFTER they won. Now they lost, and it's all my fault because I gave them good luck gummies that weren't so lucky.

They won last time I gave them out. :(

Craving some raviolis. So off I go. Cheese and spinach raviolis, it's what's for dinner tonight.

Go me.

Will be back again soon I'm sure. Until then I leave you with this....


Funny & Naughty Comments & Graphics
~Magickal Graphics~

Friday, October 18, 2013

Another Full Moon Awaits

Eight minutes to write a decent blog, then I have to get ready for work.

Can I do it?

Let's see.

My week has been very crazy to say the least. The kids at work have been bouncing off the walls. My coworker laughs at me because I keep saying "it's the full moon", but I don't think she believes me. She likes to mock my full moon theory.

That's okay, we have fun with it.

Yesterday I made a rhetorical statement "I wonder why the kids are acting so goofy today."
Her reply, "It's the full moon."
"Are you mocking me? You're mocking me. Go ahead, I know you don't believe me."

Her response, "I know tides and people and all things happen because of the full moon."

I just look at her with this smirk of disdain and then smile.

"You're hilarious," as I take on a hint of humorous sarcasm.

I do believe planetary activity influences human behavior. Call me crazy, weird, insane. I don't care. I live on the island of misfit toys socially anyway, so who cares what everyone else thinks right?

I don't.

I had one kid try to slap me, once during the day and again as his mother came into the room to pick him up.  She was not very happy with him. We had kids climbing up on the tables and chairs and pushing and shoving more so than other times. It was like a zoo had let the animals free in there yesterday.

 I had another child tell every parent that came in to pick their kids up, that "Miss Barb is not nice to me."  Thankfully these parents know me and know what I am like. When her mother came to pick her up, she informed us that this little girl gave her father the cold shoulder for three days. We were all cracking up over it.  She's a cute little bugger, and has some witty sayings from time to time that have us all in stitches.

But apparently the full moon brings out her dark side in full bloom.

Okay not really the full moon, but it's fun to blame her moods on the moon anyway.

My kids always seem to fight worse when there is a full moon approaching.

Of course my twins were born on full moon, with a lunar eclipse that morning to boot. Talk about tons of energy.

YIKES!

And the drivers on the road are crazier as well.

I almost got hit, not once, not twice, but three times by drivers who had no respect for the rules of the road(or other drivers for that matter).  It was like they were the only ones on the road and nobody else mattered. Forget a four-way stop too, those are like a death trap these past few days.

Hoping that when I get in my van today the people that come into contact with me, do so without craziness or zombie-like attitudes.  I hope that the kids in my class listen and aren't bouncing all over the walls like they were the past three days.

Well, eight minutes are up.

I have to go now.

I will be back later this weekend.

Have a good one all!



Days of the Week Comments
~Magickal Graphics~

Tuesday, October 15, 2013

What Is The Solution To Finding World Peace?......DANCE!

It's 11:10 on a near full moon evening.

I just got done doing some dishes and mopping my floor.  I stepped outside on my patio and saw the light from the moon glowing brightly. I had to get a photo of it....so I did.





Not exactly a professional quality photo, but a good one I suppose for the crappy camera phone I have. No flash, no fancy additions, just point, click voila'!

It's a little blurry, but looks kind of cool in all it's "blurriness".

I tried cleaning the lens and this is what I got:




Looks a little blue to me.  That song lyric "Blue Moooooon, you saw me standing alonnnnnne, without a love of my own...." was running through my head after I looked at this photo.  I don't know the rest of the words, but it fits me I do believe.

So why am I up so late, on a night before a Wednesday work day(vs. a Friday work day)? Well, I just can't sleep.

I had a long day at work and even longer evening when I got home. I ran to the store in record timing.  Within 30 minutes I was back home. 5 minute drive to the store, 20 minutes or so in the store shopping and 5 minutes back home. Then the kids got home after their dad dropped them off, and my boys started fighting.  This led to my oldest twin giving my youngest twin a bloody nose with a Nerf gun.

The irony, right? Nerf Gun? Really?

Then my son picked up my shoe, and tried to pummel his brother with it. I finally managed to get my son down on the couch by grabbing his arms from behind and told him to chill out. As he is placing the ice pack I got him (paper towel/ice rendition of an ice pack) on his nose all pissed off at his brother and his brother is fuming as well in all their madness, I heard a new song come on the Holiday Music Channel. My daughter is just standing in the middle of the living room with a balloon in her hand staring at me and grinning, when this song came on:







....and the next thing I know.....

I start dancing.

Really goofy dancing. Like sixties beach party dancing, and my oldest twin is getting madder because he doesn't want to laugh and my youngest twin has this smirk on his face. Before I know it, my youngest twin and my daughter are laughing at me and then I said "Come on let's dance!" So my daughter begins to dance with me.

The boys are slouched at opposite ends of the couch  and I get closer to my oldest twin making goofy faces at him and shaking my legs and my not so tiny bum and next thing I know he is in stitches while trying to be mad.

PRICELESS.

So yeah, this is what I highly suggest you do the next time you witness a fight breaking out. Whether that fight be between your kids, you and your husband/wife, or someone at the bar there's only one thing you can do to stop the fists or words flying out:

Break out in dance and a rather quirky facial expressions.

They will either think you are crazy.
Or they will join in.

I highly suggest a good polka.

This one comes to mind:





Got to love a good polka!

*grabs broom and dustpan and swirls around floor in socks; clicks heels in the air*

So yeah, I think I'm onto something here.

Forget all those parenting magazines you've read, all the months or years of counseling you or your kids have been to. 

No need for bullying anymore either.

Everyone just get up and dance.

Dance all your problems away....

This is my solution for world peace:



Dancing Santa

DANCE!!!!!!!

That's it! Just move with the music and let all the problems melt away.  Dance away your bills, dance away your stupid boyfriend who just dumped your perfect self, dance away that in-law who won't stop meddling in your marriage. 

 Dance, dance, dance.

Dance as goofy and as crazy as you can.

Because we all need a little fun "crazy" once in a while, as life can sure throw us some whoppers of problems from time to time.  I was totally stressed by the time I got home from the store and knew I had to make dinner and clean the mess before me in my apartment. I was under a time constraint, but I got a lot done in the 30 minutes I had left to cook and clean after my 30 minute shopping spree.

Know how I got a lot done(including cleaning out my pantry)? 

I DANCED!!!!
 I was dancing around my kitchen before my kids even got home. Monster Mash came on and I was just a dancin' like there was no tomorrow. No one except the birds saw me, and they didn't seem to mind.  Everything that was on my mind; crappy van stalling on me, bills that need paying, worrying about my future and life in general....POOF!

Gone, just like that!

Okay, I need to get off this thing. It's almost midnight and no amount of dancing is going to cure my tired ass tomorrow at work...well it might a little bit...because I dance all around with those cute little buggers at work. I get in a good giggle or two as well.

Enjoy life. Listen to the music and when life gets you down, turn up that radio/stereo/CD player/TV and just get off your ass and DANCE!




Dancing in the Rain
Make your Twitter look amazing withFree Twitter Backgrounds

Sunday, October 13, 2013

Kids With Nasty Attitudes Drive Me Insane

Enjoyed my kids party this evening.

Met some nice people, well, let me just say I knew these people from the kids sports activities, but I never really engaged in conversation with them until tonight...not because I am rude or mean, but because these are my ex's little community of friends(i.e. sports fanatics) and I'd much rather just stay away from "his friends" as much as possible.

Nice people though...well, a few of them were.

So my kids had a nice time and apparently they were raving about the cake to their grandmother all about how they loved the cake and how they helped decorate it.  They told her it was a cool cake. So despite the fact I couldn't throw them a "cool non-expensive party", I did manage to make them a "cool cake".

*pats self on back and smiles*

Then we got home after the festivities were over.

And I'm sitting on my patio enjoying the lovely weather.

And these stupid punk kids are walking by. I'm not bothering them when all of a sudden one of them says "God that's too fat. I'm glad I'm not that fat."(referring to me) I wanted to go down there and punch them in the head and ask them where they got mouths like that when talking (indirectly) to or about an adult. I continued viewing my kids birthday pictures on my phone, didn't say a word. Then the stupid kid keeps going on about it as they are walking down the sidewalk and says "I have the perfect body. I'm glad I'm not THAT fat."


You know it hurt, I won't lie. But the sane adult rational part of me knows that these are stupid kids that are just punks and their opinions mean nothing in reality.

Am I FAT?

Well, let me be honest here, I could stand to lose about 20 pounds and truth be told it's stress. It's lack of a social life, lack of any life or time to even bother with any kind of health regimen.   Sure I could walk, or do ten minutes of sit ups, but I'm just too damn lazy at this point because I have much more pressing issues in my life at the moment like paying bills, or finding insurance, keeping my job, and keeping my kids in line and fed and clothed.

Call them excuses I don't care.

I'm fat maybe. Well, not fat per say, just overweight for my height.

It's all in the middle of me for the most part.

I miss my thin, sexy self from ten years ago, and it pisses me off some days when I can't fit into those clothes of  long ago.

I have no ambition to lose weight. Here are a few reasons why:

*I don't want to date.
*I am not running a marathon.
*I'm not trying to get on Project Runway
*I'm not looking to be a stripper or a Playboy Bunny or work at Hooter's
*I'm in a place in my life where I am not happy and being thin is not on my top ten list of things to do that I procrastinate doing anyway

Sure I probably sound a bit snarky in this post.

Because I mean to sound snarky.

Because stupid punk ass kids who think they can just blurt out that someone is fat ruined my damn day.

And I'm mad.

Damn mad.

Mad enough to pay for a treadmill or do some situps?

Nope.

I am just tired of these stupid kids with their stupid bully punk ass mouths and attitudes.

That chick is just lucky that I was too damn tired to enter into a verbal war with her because it would not have been pretty.

And lucky for her I am also a lot more mature and educated than she'll ever be.

And as far as I'm concerned I'd rather be fat than ignorant any day of the week.


Sunday Posting....Just Because I Felt Like Blogging

Days Of The Week Comments


*Once again a lovely post from me to you, started yesterday and finished today*

Today has been rather hectic.

I woke up this morning, rather abruptly at 6 a.m , and couldn't go back to sleep .  I sat outside and called my mom to find out the details of my cousin's service arrangements(despite the fact I cannot attend...distance being the issue there 1700 miles away). 

You should have seen all the blackbirds that were all over the lawn outside my apartment complex this morning. I had never seen so many of those birds in my community since I moved here.

And I've been out many early mornings since I've lived here almost two years. It was nice to see birds other than pigeons grazing on the grounds for a change. It was like a scene from that 1950's movie The Birds.  I came inside and wanted to wake the kids to show them all the birds and when I went to the window, they were gone.

Then about an hour later, I got this really achy feeling all over. My head had this piercing pain on the right side and just above my right eye. I managed to get a cat nap when my ex picked the kids up for their game. I had to go shopping for more cake items for my boys party and to be honest, I was not in a frame of mind to sit through a whole game for two hours. I'd of snapped at someone for sure.

I went to Wally World after a brief nap, and within seconds of me walking through the door there is a woman with that panicked look on her face that every mother knows when they've lost a kid in a store,( even if the kid just walked around to the gum display on the other lane beside her). As I walk past this mother, I hear her asking her son(who was about 10 or 11) "Where is she?"

I continued walking in a slow, dazed crawl as I pushed the shopping cart forward. I hear that poor mother screaming "Hailey! Hailey where are you?" I continue perusing the aisles not really sure what I'm looking for and as I look to my left down one of the aisles, I see this tiny little girl with blond hair, blue eyes in a pink sweatshirt with this look of fear on her face standing in the girls' clothing department.  I slowly walk down the aisle towards her and smile. I didn't want to startle her, and as I got closer I said "Are you looking for your mommy?" in that high-pitched voice we use sometimes when talking to little ones.  She said nothing.  I then asked her "Are you Hailey?" She nodded.

I told her "Your mommy is looking for you. Come with me sweetie, it's okay."

The sheer fact that she came with me scared me a tad bit. This poor kid could have walked off with anyone. I did look for a store associate, but seriously, when do you ever find someone at ANY store when you really need them? Just like that cop you need when the asshat in the Camaro cuts you off and dodges a red light. You keep saying "Where is a cop when you need one?"

*ooops, tangent thought there*

I walked towards the front of the store with little Hailey down the main aisle. As we were walking I see her mom and brother turn down our aisle and I motion to the mom with my hand in the air pointing down to her daughter who was next to me and the cart. I said with a grin, "She was in the girl's clothing section shopping for clothes I guess." The mom didn't say anything to me,  acknowledging she heard my comment, she just  hugged her daughter and I just kept on walking in my dazed and confused and utterly ill state.

I was just glad it was me and not some crazed psycho with bad intentions that found her.


Divider Graphics

 
So today is Sunday.  I finally managed to bake my boys' cake last night. Made a full sheet cake, dear goodness that's a lot of cake. So I let it cool down because the last time I tried in a hurried fashion to remove the cake from the pan half of it stuck to the pan and I had to do "cake surgery" to repair the damages because the pan hadn't cooled enough when I tried to remove it. So I thought I learned my lesson last time and made sure to double grease and flour the pan and let it set until morning before I attempted to remove it.

I have my oldest twin help me out. He carries the cake to the table, I cut the cardboard and wrap it like crazy in aluminum foil so it was sturdy. I flip the pan over, tap it lightly to remove it and lift up the pan....no cake.

Shit!

So now my son and I are banging on the bottom of the cake pan like we are smashing a spider or something. I flip it over...still no cake on the board.

Now I'm REALLY annoyed. 

I take an offset mini-spatula and attempt to nudge it around the sides and up just enough so it wouldn't stick then we flipped it again.

Wouldn't ya know it? The damn thing stuck again and part of the edge and a piece of the top and bottom were still in the pan. So there I was looking at all three kids who are now gathered around, watching me try to get this sucker on the board and I tell them "I shall work my baking magic. Time for surgery!" 

And I iced the hell out of that cake putting it back together. They were helping me figure out which pieces went where.

So now it's setting in the fridge. We have a trip to the store to make and then I have to decorate it. The boys are anxiously awaiting their moment to help decorate their cake.  This should be interesting.

We're going with a football theme. I'll have to post a pic when it's done.



Divider Graphics
I know I had more to blog about here.
Unfortunately my brain is nothing but mush.
This has been a very emotionally draining week on me.
Hormones didn't help much either in the process.
 
I hope you all have a lovely Sunday.
 
I may or may not be back later.
 
 
 

Friday, October 11, 2013

Emotions Got the Best of Me


I managed to get through yesterday.

I was on my lunch break, driving, and this song came on the radio and I was thinking about my cousin who passed away.  When the line "Sing with me, if just for today, maybe tomorrow the good lord will take you away" came around I just lost it.


Don't ask me why.

I was crying so damn hard.

So I'm trying to get myself together before I get back to work with my one cheeseburger and two chicken wraps my friend gave me money to get, and after my major cryfest I was okay again. Wiped my eyes, and took a deep breath and went back to work.

I don't know why I'm so upset.  It's not like we chatted daily, although I really do feel like shit for never friending him on Facebook. It may sound stupid, but it's true. At least I could have been in his life a little more than I was.

So why was I so upset? I think first of all, it's because I worry about my aunt, being alone now in that big house by herself. I also think that the reality of how death can just sneak up on ya like a cat in the night and take you away in the blink of an eye makes one a little bit emotional.

Also, my cousin....was family.

I don't care if you are a 3rd cousin twice removed, or a friend, or a friend of a friend.  When you know someone, and no matter if you haven't seen them in years, decades even, the pain of losing someone you had shared your life with at holiday parties, birthday parties and weddings can be so overwhelming on someone no matter how close or distant that relationship was.

He was my cousin, and I cannot fathom how someone as good-natured, and caring and giving could be taken from this earth so soon.

It doesn't make sense to me.

Why do all the good people get taken and the asshats and morons get to stay?

Who pushes the life/death buttons up there?  I want them fired.

Seriously.

I  have to get going now.

I have said my peace.

Will hopefully have a more uplifting blog this weekend, but for now, I had to share my thoughts.

My blog, my thoughts.

Despite the melancholy demeanor of this post I leave you with this:

Days of the Week Comments

Thursday, October 10, 2013

So Unexpected

Today is a very somber day for me.

Last night I was cleaning house, listening to Halloween music when I received a text. Shortly after I got a phone call from my mom.  She told me that my cousin had passed away unexpectedly. I tried so hard to hold back the tears while we were on the phone. I can't imagine what my aunt must be going through at this time. I wasn't really close to this cousin of mine, but all I kept thinking was "why didn't I friend him on facebook?"

I know dumb, right?

He was a really good guy, with a kind heart and a beautiful soul. When my mom was relaying the details I just sat on the end of the phone still trying to process the fact that he was gone.

This song kept going through my head. This was the song that was playing on the radio when I was getting ready for my grandmother's funeral back in 1996.  It was actually ironic that this song came on at that particular time.  But I can't forget this song, nor the lyrics to it any time there is a death of a loved one.





I literally am sobbing buckets over here.  I feel bad for my aunt who just lost her husband almost a year ago in November.

Now she lost her son.

Life is just not a guarantee.

If anything I'm learning that our loved ones need to be cherished and hugged and kissed and told how important they are to us because you never know when their day will come to say good bye forever.  And definitely friend them on Facebook if distance or time gets between you. Keep in touch through some type of communication. Even if it is a text to say "Hey, how was your day?" with a reply of, "Awesome, thanks for asking. How about you?"

Now I have to go to work and try to function as best I can. I have to not think about this and entertain a group of 20 two to three year old kids while putting on a brave happy face.

At least now my cousin is with his father. Keeping him company and watching over those that still miss them both so very much.

My thoughts and prayers are with my cousins and my aunt and all those who were close to him. May they all find peace and strength during this difficult time in their lives.


REST IN PEACE "CUZ"! You will be missed.







Saturday, October 5, 2013

Saturday Morning Ramblings

I am really trying to get a good readership base on my blog here. To those who actually do read and occasionally comment I say:


Cute Thank You Comments

To those of you who stumble upon my page and read but may not comment, or are unable to comment do to technical glitches that may occur I also say thank you to you as well.

I'm still trying to figure out the commenting on this site.
I use to be able to comment from my dashboard, but for some reason Blogger has decided it is best to make us work for our ability to post for free to make our blogs people and comment friendly.
 
I tried to comment to the two comments on my last blog post and I can't even do that. Where is that "reply back" button?* Shuffles around keyboard and computer desk looking for it*
 
Nope, it's not here.

**********

I am sitting here listening to the movie "The Last Mimzy" while I blog. I love this movie.  It's such a cute little kid's movie. 
I actually slept in this morning. It was 8:00 before I hopped off the couch and went to make my coffee.

Last night I was completely and utterly exhausted by 9:30. I wanted to rent a movie, but ended up literally passing out, remote control in hand, before 10 sometime. 

I had talked to a friend of mine who I haven't seen in person in three years at her Christmas party, we have chatted briefly via small comments here and there on Facebook over the years, and she has invited me over on a few occasions, but life and a crappy vehicle get in the way. So I never took her up on the offer. 
 
 She is having some issues with her son and his school admin. I won't go into detail about it, the only thing I will share is that I had a similar experience myself about 5 years ago, which is the reason I called her to begin with.  Hoped to share some insight and my small personal victories with her in the hopes of saving her some stress-filled days and nights. I'll talk more about education and the "system" in another post.

So we chatted a little while, and then before we hung up she asked me if I had the kids this year on Thanksgiving. I told her that it was my ex's  year, and she invited me over for dinner.

I was like a teenage girl who got asked to prom.
*giggles*
 
No joke, I hate spending holidays alone. Same old infomercials on the TV, same old reruns and football and crap I'm really not interested in, or I blog like there is no tomorrow and end up posting three or four useless blogs in my mass amount of holiday free-time. (*Check out July 4th, I posted two long-winded blogs in a matter of just a few hours and this one takes the cake I do believe LOLL (did I just put text-speak in my blog? My blog, who cares, if you don't like my text-speak, then just don't read this I guess...hee hee)Talk about sheer boredom from being alone...I couldn't stop typing or thinking that day).

I was so grateful my friend offered an invitation to me for the holiday. I asked her "What do you want me to bring?"

"Bake something".

She knows I have a passion for baking. So I said "Okay, I'll bake something."

At that moment I was going through my brain trying to think of recipes to make for this big day. Despite the fact it's almost eight weeks away...maybe even nine weeks.

Didn't care.

"Nutcups, Napoleons, Lemon Squares, Cookies, Tarts, Cupcakes(no, not cupcakes....too kid-like)", as she was talking to me(and yes I was listening) I was thinking of what I could bake that would be spectacular for the holiday.

Mind you,  my kids birthdays aren't even out of the way yet(see last blog post) and I'm already planning for Thanksgiving.

So now I have to figure out something spectacular to bake for the big holiday. 
 
Why does it have to be spectacular?
 
Because it's a holiday that's why.
 
Okay, I have lots to do today.
 
So I'm going to go and clean and shop for groceries and pay my phone bill and then I'll head back home. My boys' birthday is Tuesday and I don't even have a gift yet. 
 
I'm slacking.
 
I'm sure I'll be back later this evening. 
 
 
 
My favorite part of a roller-coaster ride is when you're going up and you're slightly scared and really excited. You don't know what's coming next but you know it's going to be good. You can't handle it, go on the carousel.
 
 
 

Thursday, October 3, 2013

Let the Holidays Begin

~Halloween



Ahhh, yes.....my favorite time of year....the beginning of the holiday season when all that money you saved all spring and summer is spent in the blink of an eye. 

At least for me, it's gone before I can blink twice.

My twins birthday is next week. I will be baking a football themed cake for them as they requested, and I'm also in charge of purchasing the ice cream.  Small amount to pay considering their father has decided to have their party at one of those fancy kid places with all the lights and buzzers to boot. Will cost him a good $100-$150 for the whole experience. 

I think he's foolish.

I've shared my thoughts with him.

We could simply throw an elaborate kid's themed party at his house, food, snacks, cake and ice cream for about 60% less than what he's forking over to those folks at the party place.  I remember one year, it was just me and the kids. I had a small part-time job that paid a decent wage and I went to the dollar store and picked up some random toys for prizes, a pin the tail on the donkey game, and we played a balloon game where I hid a dime in one of the balloons and they all had to pick a few colors and sit on them. If they got the dime, they won the grand prize.

I was so poor, and couldn't afford a luxurious party place party, so that's what my kids were stuck with. I listened to them moan and whine about how they wanted to go to Chuck E. Cheese. Past birthdays were visited by Spiderman, Cinderella for my daughter and other fancy venues. I just couldn't afford it.  And I figured they would have to learn a lesson about money.

The day of the party came. My house was spotless. We played Halloween music in the background and I served those Totino's pizzas that I got at the store, I bought six of them for a buck each(those suckers are tasty) and some chips and soda as well.

At the end of the night, before we went to bed, my boys told me "Mom, that was the BEST party ever!" You don't know how happy that made me to hear them say that. I almost cried.

I did the same thing for my daughter's birthday the following month. She too said it was the best party ever.

So to all those parents out there who fork over their life's savings to get Bonzo the Bear or Elmo or rent a whole toy store to appease their children on their special day, I say  you are NUTS. A simple party, at home, is just as good as those fancy shmancy parties you spend your kid's college tuition on. And the memories are just as good if not better. Because your kids aren't lost in a sea of children, you have more interaction with them and it just seems to me, in my opinion anyway, that it's so much more personal.

I've seen women compete over who had the best birthday party venue. I think some parents live vicariously through their children, trying to out do the last party they attended with their kids to show the other soccer moms, "Look at me! Look at me! I'm the greatest mother in the world!"  Maybe not the smartest mom, because what you spent on that party, I spent on my kid's party, two trips to the mall with my daughter, a trip to the zoo and a night at the movies with my kids.

So go ahead and shout to the rooftops and spend your hard-earned money...

I still have the change from my last party in my piggy bank.

After my boys' birthday rolls around, no sooner does the dust settle then my daughter's rolls around.  More money spent to make a cake, bring the ice cream and listen to their dad let us know the next expensive venue on the list. It's his money, I'm not about to part with my hard-earned cash for an expensive venue, when a nice home kid's themed venue is within arm's reach at home. Sure I'll bring the cake and the ice cream and hell I'll even throw in the paper plates and napkins too.

Fast forward through to the end of November and now you have Thanksgiving. This year won't be so bad as the kids are with dad for the remaining holidays. I get them next year. I still may make a Turkey for the holiday, just not on Thanksgiving. We won't get to watch the Macy's Thanksgiving Day parade, or name the turkey(Dexter was the last named Turkey when my middle men were here), or play football in the street together post feast. Still it won't be as expensive as last year.

Next is Christmas.

I've already started shopping around for gifts. I want to have it all done by next month. I am going to start picking up little random things here and there and although the tree may not be packed with gifts, at least there will be SOME gifts under there.

Their dad picks up the slack with his $100,000 a year job he has and all the fancy electronics he buys them at his house. All the name brand clothes, and scooters and BMX bikes and Barbie bikes....I know one day my kids will realize that it wasn't the gifts that made the holidays but the fact we were all together for them.

It's getting late here. I have a shower to take and need to wake the children for another day of school for them and work for me.

Have a wonderful Thursday. I'll be back on the weekend.

Later Folks!


Wednesday, October 2, 2013

The ER is NOT My General Practitioner

I took a short hiatus for a while to get my thoughts and life together here.

My life is still in a tad bit of disarray but I'm not going to fret about it. We only get one life and I'm not going to waste mine by consuming my tiny little brain with things that are simply out of my control.

So I will just sit back and enjoy the ride as though I'm sitting on the front seat of a roller coaster going down a steep incline.

Fun times.

Work has been interesting to say the least.

I got peed on by a 2 1/2 year old and felt like my day couldn't have gotten worse. 

Then my employer had me sign a paper stating that I was aware that I would need healthcare coverage by October 13 of this year.  That didn't make my day at all. I barely make enough to cover the bills I have, how am I suppose to scrounge up the extra nickles and dimes to cover health insurance.

I haven't been to a Doctor or ER in years. Three years ago, maybe four, was the last time I saw a doctor.

I figure if there is something wrong with me, one morning I just won't wake up.  Or I'll "wake up" only to find my name in the obits with information on how I passed.

I don't need to pay some rich doctor to tell me I'm dying.

That is in fact, if I am dying.

Let me rephrase that, because we are all dying every day; I should have said I don't need to pay some rich doctor to tell me I'm dying of some God-forsaken disease or terminal illness. Clearly if there was nothing they could do for me anyway, I just saved myself  hundreds of dollars by not knowing.  And even if they could save me, would I rather have spent that money on a trip to the movies with my kids or another round of mini golf, or would I rather spend that money on horse pills or sitting in a doctor's office waiting room for 2 hours only for him/her to tell me that this mole that looks like Spongebob on my arm isn't really cancerous.

I don't understand why one needs insurance anyway.

I didn't ask to be born. I made a choice to buy a car, so of course I must insure it. I didn't make the choice to be here, my parents did.  And technically they didn't make the choice either.

I was an "OOOPS" baby.

Perhaps there should be a clause in that law that states that if you were an "OOOPS" baby, then you don't have to get coverage.

Because you weren't really planned.

People plan to go to college, plan to buy a home, plan for retirement.  Some people plan for a baby; others don't.

So the Oopsies like myself should have a way out of this ridiculous law.

And I get it, a lot of folks(myself included at one time) aren't insured and head to an ER. I had a panic attack and couldn't get my hands to open and my arms began to do this weird thing like a venus fly trap when it catches a fly. No matter what I did, no matter how hard the paramedic tried to talk to me, I was calm and breathing okay finally, those claws of mine would not open. I felt like a lobster.

I was terrified but tried not to show it, because my three young children, who were with me at the time I was driving and had this attack, were terrified as well.

I went to the ER.

I was seen by a doctor.

 Yes, I couldn't afford to  pay the bill, but the nice woman in the office, got me a form to fill out and I was "excused" from payment a few months later.  I don't make it a habit of using the ER as my general practitioner, but I'm a tax paying citizen and if my taxes are paying for the lazy fools out there who refuse to work or abuse the system (or the illegal folk who milk it up) to get care, then why shouldn't I be able to cash in on what I put in?

I should be allowed one free pass so to speak.

And I got it.

And I haven't been to an ER since that day.


*******************

Now the government is going to penalize you if you don't have insurance.

This is the dumbest thing I have heard.

Clearly if you can't afford the insurance, how are you suppose to afford to pay the penalty?  What are they doing to do? Take your first-born child? Take all your clothes and the crappy vehicle you drive? I have about $40 in my piggy bank that sits on my desk.  I suppose if they invest it, eventually it could grow enough to make a profit that will cover the penalty for me not being able to afford the insurance.

This is the dumbest thing I have ever heard of.

Of course this is just MY opinion.

And opinions are like noses, everyone has one.