I Am NOT A Drunken Unicorn

What a day today was.

I went to cash my check. This is truly funny and just needs to be shared.

I'm sitting at the window at the check cashing place, and I hand the woman my ID.  There are those bulletproof windows at the place where I go to cash my check, and I was chatting with the woman who is a regular teller there(Maria... you are a saint). We are just giggling and talking about my day at work and I sign a slip of paper verifying the amount I will get back. I tell her "Oh My God, can I wash a window or something to lower this amount you take?" She starts laughing and tells her coworker what I said. We always joke around about simple things during my day or hers while I cash my check, and she begins counting out the money and hands me the change in that little scoop thingy.

However.... when I went to snag my change from the little scoop thingy beneath the window...

as my luck would have it.....

...my damn head slammed into the window.

(go ahead laugh at my expense, it's okay I was laughing too, I'm still laughing)

Now mind you...I have been going to this place since I got this job. I know that window is there. It's not like they moved it five inches forward or something. Nothing's changed in that place except the tellers from time to time.

So after my head's run in with said window, I look up at her and I am cracking up and she asks if I am okay(because my big ass head made a really loud THUD sound when it hit) and I laughed and rubbed my head and then the window, because there was a smudge print from either my make up or sweat (or a combo of both) and I said "Yeah, I'm okay.  I think you need to put a big red X on here though or something like people do when birds are flying around after you just cleaned the windows."

She could not stop laughing.

Neither could I.

She is trying to count my money back to me and I just kept babbling. I couldn't really tell you what I said after the window comment and the red X ....it's all a blur. She could have shorted me a 100 bucks and I wouldn't have been the wiser.

And she also continued to ask me if I was okay.

I nodded.

I was still breathing.

I was clearly OOOOO...KAY.

Oh, I do remember telling her something along the lines of, "Good thing I don't drink or do drugs. Could you imagine me if I did?" 

That put her in stitches too.

My ass would have gone straight down to the floor if I did do drugs or drink excessive amounts of alcohol(or any for that matter) on any given night had my big ass head hit the window. I thank the drinking Gods and the Weed Gods that I don't indulge in either one.

She told me she would see me next week. I said "Yeah, maybe I'll trip over a trash can...or just faint."

I could still see her laughing when I got in my van. I was still in stitches too.

But damn that did hurt. 

Ego is fine, head not so fine.

This story could have had a much more tragic ending.

For starters I could have lost my job.  Because if I was a stoner or an alcoholic, and I fell to the floor...unconscious.... no doubt, they would have called an ambulance.

At that point, the medic would have taken my pulse, noticed the protruding growth from the middle of my forehead, assessed the situation and after realizing I'm not a drunken unicorn, loads me onto the rig.

I would have ended up in the ER, where I would have waited for hours, probably rambling to the old homeless guy about how I am homeless too. Because I'm going to lose my job, because they will do a blood test and all the drugs/alcohol I consumed will be enough to fire me.

"So dear homeless guy named Ed", I'll say as I wait on the stretcher in the cold, lonely hallway of the ER, "please save me a box on the corner of Main and Las Vegas Blvd. north. I'll see if I can get us some old donuts from some people I know at the 7-11 up there." (not really, but remember I'm on drugs or an alcoholic in this hypothetical scenario...nothing makes sense and I love and know everyone even if I don't).

I will then be transported to surgery. Where they will remove above-mentioned protruding growth from my brain because as it turned out a teeny tiny piece of that hardcore glass was imbedded in my useless brain and now it is infected, hence the growth, and needs to be removed....STAT!

I get a hottie doctor, who I overhear saying, "Damn shame she's an alcoholic/druggie, she's a little good-looking here. I'd marry this one if she was clean."

Now I'll be trying to come out of my alcohol/drug induced state, trying to act "Normal" only to tell him I simply took way too many Midol and that the cramps were so unbearable that I was going to jump in front of a bus after I swallowed all those Midol, but then I decided I'll just jump in front of a bulletproof window instead...so I could meet....YOU DOC!

He'll laugh at me, and I'll cry.

Then, he'll cut my head open, pull out the shard of glass and stitch his phone number into my forehead with a note that says "When you sober up call me and I'll save you from yourself."

Okay...not really...that was really far-fetched...wasn't it?

See, I don't need drugs.

Or alcohol.

I have my own little world I live in here.

And I think that knock on that head made my imagination even more out there than before.

But wasn't this a fun story?

It's all true.

Up until the part I made up the what if story.

That's NOT true.

I'm not a stoner or alcoholic thank you.

I'm naturally dingy.  Why add fuel to the fire, right? 

Okay, I just had to post this.

Too funny not to post it.

I also tripped over a chair at work in the classroom, and also tripped on my fan at home here tonight.

I'm having a good day.

NO, REALLY I AM...
*smiles*

Okay....it's off to bake now.

Finally got my damn cream cheese. Was gonna blog about that whole shopping thing, but that's a blog for later.

I'll be back soon I'm sure. Maybe while the nut cups are baking.

“And falling's just another way to fly.”
― Emilie Autumn

Clouds, Cows and Other Dream Things

I love this graphic. Fits this post I believe.    Found it on the magickalgraphics.com website in the new age/meditation category. I love that site.

Well, it's a beautiful Monday morning so far. I woke up at 4:48 when my ex brought my kids over. He gets them after school on my weeks for me, so I take them to school for him because his shift starts well before the birds are up in the morning.  It's a win, win situation for everyone except the poor kids who have to wake up early. They usually go right back to sleep anyway. I have been having some really vivid dreams lately. The one I had yesterday was kind of fun. I dreamed that I was going over this hill and going down it quickly in a car as my stomach was racing and lifting up in my throat,  like that feeling you get on a roller coaster ride when it's going down really fast and steep.  That's the feeling I got in this dream. Not sure what causes that feeling in dreams. I know when you are trying to run in a dream and you are stuck or going slow it usually means your feet are tangled up in the sheets.   Or how about that feeling of being shocked? It's like an electrical charge running through your body. I've had those dreams before. I was hit by lightning in a dream once. It felt so real. Not that I've ever gotten hit by lightning, but I have gotten shocked by a popcorn popper back in the 80's at a job I had in a daycare center.    Kind of a similar feeling I suppose.   I often wonder about dreams.   Are they just dreams, or messages from our subconscious minds, or messages from deceased loved ones or the Universe?   Or are they just manifestations of a very stressful day?   Hmm....   My oldest twin son was talking to me the other day about dreams. He told me that if I ever see him hitting himself while he is sleeping, to wake him up because he is having a bad dream and trying to wake up. I don't know how well that works for him, I've never seen him slap himself senseless while his REM phase of sleep is going on.    I've had dreams about three moons in the sky and a hand coming down between them. I also had a dream about cows in the sky. Instead of clouds, there were cows.  Perhaps my brain got the two mixed up. They sound almost the same. I also had a dream one time that I was in a grotto at the church we attended when I was a child, and Mary(Jesus' Mother) floated out of the grotto and was chasing me out of the church.   That was creepy.   Never did like the feeling I got in a Catholic Church.  Always gave me the heebie jeebies. Maybe it's all those Omen movies or Exorcist movies I watched when I was younger. Who knows. All I know is churches give me the willies.   End of Days movie with Arnold (however you spell his last name) is a perfect example of the whole creepy church thing going on.   I have also had dreams where I've seen my grandmother; quite a few actually. Last dream I had she asked me to make her pancakes.    So I did. In real life. I made some pancakes, and a cup of coffee and made a table setting for her at my dining room table.  I lit an angel candle and just talked to her like she was really there. Made me cry really bad, cause I miss her so much, and I knew that she wouldn't answer me(well, not in the physical sense anyway). Was hoping I'd see her in another dream telling me how tasty those pancakes were and how yummy the coffee was.    But that never happened.   I fed those pancakes to the birds by the way after my "breakfast with grandma" was over.    My daughter was giggling so hard in a dream she had. My youngest twin son did the same thing too once time. I wish they could remember what was so gosh darn funny in those dreams but most times they can't tell me what happened. They seem to only remember the dreams that scare the living crap out of them.   My ex use to talk in his sleep a lot. Of course some times the things he would say wouldn't be appropriate for young ears. And sometimes, just for shits and giggles, the kids and I would talk to him and he would say the most ridiculous things. We'd all be laughing and he'd be passed out cold, but answering us and never waking up really.    I miss those days.   Don't miss the ex, just the fun times me and the kids had when I lived with him.     I don't miss the house we lived in though. I'll blog about that another day.   That place had something in it...an otherworldly something in it.  I wouldn't make this shit up either. It really happened. I'll dedicate a whole entire blog to the stories of that house.   You won't believe me, but I swear to you everything I will post is true.   Why would I lie to you all? I don't want to sleep with you. I don't want to date you. So there you go.   Well, it's about that time. Gotta run.
Have a magnificent Monday.   I'll be around later.        “You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.”
― Dr. Seuss         Love this song!

All Is Well In My Little World

Well, I have been a busy little bee here today.

Someone give me a gold star please on my chore chart. I did just about every chore I could in this apartment today.  The only thing I didn't do was my room and the bathrooms. I just did the kids' bathroom two days ago. So I'm good there. I did the tub in my bathroom and the toilet but no mopping or sink duty yet.

I wish I had taken a picture of the madness that was in my kids' rooms. You would not believe the amount of Monster High Dolls, Monster High Doll shoes/dresses/brushes, papers, fake nails and stuffed animals I found all over my daughter's room. Not to mention the amount of clothes that I had to hang up that she got from a neighbor of ours who knew I am a single mom and is also a single mom herself.

I rearranged her furniture, vacuumed and I still have to clear off her dresser. But I figured it's her room the more I thought about it....let her clean it. I did enough in there.

Then I went to the boys' room.

Holy Cow Batman!! There were football and Angry Birds cards from a game they got last Christmas just strewn all over the floor, Army men, Easter Grass(don't ask, don't know why that's still in their room), two robes, clothes hanging out of their dresser(because God forbid they slowly file through the shirts in their shirt drawer neatly, no they have to toss it all about and make it look like a grenade exploded in their shirt and pajama drawers), their closet floor was nowhere to be found.  I found parts to a wooden dinosaur set a friend of mine sent them in the mail last Christmas and tons of water balloons....broken balloons....everywhere.  Then I picked up something, I couldn't really see what it was, but it felt like a dried up bug. *shivers* No telling what the hell it was, but it's gone now.

I was racing to get the rooms done before the sun set, because I wanted to vacuum and toss the vacuum bag into the trash and take out the kitchen and bedroom trash as soon as I was done.  By the time I got to vacuuming, I was a giant ball of sweat. My eyes were burning. No joke. The sweat was so intense I felt like a sponge that needed wringing. I could just feel the calories  from the ice cream with Reddi Whip I ate after lunch pouring out of my body I was working so hard to finish cleaning up the rooms.

Boy did I feel good after I was done. I smiled so big. Nobody could see me, didn't matter, because I finally got my home looking more like a home and less like a landfill after all my hard work today.  It was so nice to be able to walk the laundry to my boys' room without having to worry about stepping on a Lego or Army man. 

Speaking of Army Men....uh, oh...here goes the transition thought.....why are there no Army women in the package of Army men? Actually I think the packaging says "soldiers", but still, women are soldiers. Where are the Women in the soldier bag? Perhaps I should get a petition going to those soldier marketing departments and request women be put in the bags too.

Geeze.

Common sense folks.  Common Frickin' Sense.

So after my cleaning spree I headed out onto my patio to relax. I really needed a shower and that's exactly what I did. I hate taking a shower when I'm all sweaty because when I wash my hair I never really feel like it's clean. (weird..I know...)  Anyway, I did it anyway, just to get all the funk off me. I felt so rejuvenated after that shower too. I could have taken on a whole other cleaning project, but chose to throw one more load of laundry in the wash and get on here and blog.

So here I am.

Aren't you thrilled?

What else have I done today? I watched Gilmore Girls, Veronica Mars, and Sister Wives. I have to say that Sister Wives show is a real hoot. I love that family. They are like Yours, Mine and Ours only it's Yours are Mine and Ours are Yours. Know what I mean?  It's really cool how they all work together and there is no jealousy really between the wives, or no "favorites". I do think the husband comes off a little bossy. I like a man who is in charge and knows what he is doing, I just can't handle bossy.

Bossy and Arrogant are two major turnoffs.

Kudos to these women for what they do. I couldn't do it. I do not like to share my toys. If he's mine, he's all mine or he can hit the damn road thank you. I'm too old for playing games...hang on let me rephrase that...I'm a sprite 43 year old, who is not OLD, just too MATURE for game playing....unless there is role playing involved....and a french maid's outfit...and....

I'M KIDDING!!!!!

Anyway....okay, pay attention....back to reality here.

Oh, for those of you who read my last post with the "Boobie" link in it....it wasn't an actual boobie as in a breast, like I would post a pic of my breast(or anyone else for that matter)*giggles*, it was, in fact a photo of a bird. I laughed so hard when I read the comments on that.  This is the link to that blog: A Lot About Nothing 

I can't believe how early it is getting dark around here. Makes me want to crawl under a blanket and go to bed by 8:00. The sun had set by 8:00 tonight. How depressing.  I realize the seasons change, but why can't we adjust the clocks so that at 8:00 at night it's still bright and 8:00 in the morning it's still dark?

THEY DO IT IN ALASKA SIX MONTHS OUT OF THE YEAR!

Hmm....I wanted to bake nut cups this evening.  Then I realized that I didn't have cream cheese a MAJOR component in the dough recipe for said nut cups. I was pissed. Well not really pissed, more like disappointed. I had such a taste for those little suckers. Now with darkness falling upon me so early, it makes me want to bake. Like a pregnant woman who cleans like crazy before her labor begins(called Nesting if you must know), my biological baking clock goes into baking mode once the nights start getting longer. I don't even need a reason or holiday, I just have the urge to "bake something", so I do.

It's 9:00 and I just realized I didn't eat any dinner. I had potato crusted cod I fried up for lunch with some rice, and I have one more fillet that I can cook if I really want to for dinner.

However, I may just throw my laundry in the dryer, fold the socks that are in there now and go to bed.

Who knows?

I hope you all have a lovely start to your week.  Oh, and in case you haven't noticed, I have started as of yesterday, posting uplifting quotes on the bottom of each blog. Some might be smart ass quotes, others will be inspirational or thought-provoking...depending on what floats my boat at the time.

I go with my gut.

Okay, toodles to all of you who have passed by. Please, leave a comment.  Go ahead. Keep trying until it posts. It has a pop up window, so if you have a pop-up blocker that is half your problem right there. If there is an option that says "allow pop ups for this awesome blog site only" click yes. :)

"When the power of love overcomes the love of power

the world will know peace."

-Jimi Hendrix-

Just Random Saturday Ramblings

Okay....

I am getting off to a good start this morning.

I have already paid my utility bills and did some grocery shopping. I am currently eating the sushi I purchased while grocery shopping and am enjoying an ice cold Coca-Cola(I'm a coke addict...in the good way that is) *wink*.

If you must know...I prefer the fountain type Coca-Cola, but I'll take it anyway I can get my Coke, whether that be in a cup from a bottle, can or carafe; I'll even take it from a keg. There you go Coca-Cola another free Ad compliments of me.

Can I get a free case of soda out of that?

Anyway, where was I dammit...???....umm....oh yeah, I am proud of my morning so far. Normally on a Saturday morning, I am still in my jammies, plunked down in front of the TV or my computer here and  barely get moving before 3 p.m.  This is not a lie, this is truth. Because when my kids aren't here, I have nothing to do.

No reason to do anything really.

Or at least that is what my procrastinating brains says to me on most Saturday mornings, despite the fact my sorry ass was up at 6 a.m. 

I actually DO have things to do. Mop, Vacuum, Dust, do laundry, find all the rooms that are inside this messy abode I call home.  However, with no motivation of visitors stopping by at the drop of a hat, or a hot date coming over to pick me up, there is no motivation to make me organize and bother cleaning on a Saturday.  Then I think back to last weekend, and the whole gas fella asking to come inside my place, let's just say it makes a very non-motivated woman become very, very motivated all of a sudden.

A friend of mine called and asked me to babysit. I had to turn her down.  I have so much to do today with very little time to do it. I even missed my kids game because of it, I totally forgot they had a game because they are with their dad. That's how bad things are around this place. I need to get my organizational groove back, and having two kids under the age of 10 will not help me on my quest to do that.  I was actually surprised the word "NO" came out of my mouth, because truth be told, I have a hard time with saying no.  I have been told repeatedly and read self-esteem articles about how once in a while you have to just say "NO".  Normally I feel guilty, like if I say no then I'll never hear from that person again or something, or that I'm being selfish but at this point in my life, if someone lets go of a friendship because of that, I'm guessing they probably weren't much  of a friend to begin with anyway.  And if I don't take care of my needs first(mental/physical well-being) then I won't be much help to anyone including my own kids or any other kids for that matter.

She is a good friend though, and we continued chatting after I had to turn down her request. Most people would be like "Well, gotta run, thanks anyways." Click.

*******************************************

Just got off the phone with a dear friend of mine. We talked for three hours. We would have talked longer I'm sure, but our batteries on our phones were both dying. We hadn't chatted in ages. But you'd of never guessed it by our time spent catching up on her health, her job, her health at her job, my health,  my job, religion, kids and their lack of respect these days, a friend of ours from the past and a few other topics that came up. I managed to finish my dishes while we talked and she managed to get her grocery list to her boyfriend who called twice during our recapping of the month's events in our lives.

I keep having these deja vu moments. They are driving me crazy. I have them quite frequently at work, more so there than here lately. What is deja vu anyway? I mean, what causes it to happen?

I'm thinking of writing a blog post that was discussed during my conversation with my friend. Thing is though, it's very controversial and might ruffle some feathers. However, since this is my blog, my "front porch" I suppose I have a right to speak freely about things that irk, astonish or amaze me from time to time. I really do try to keep the atmosphere around here humorous.  But even when I'd talk to my friend back in Indiana on her front porch, we didn't always talk about funny things. 

So yes, I think that's what I'm going to do. 

This blog is rather blah anyway. However, I will share a little anecdote from work yesterday to make you smile a bit.

I was taking care of one of the little boys at work.  As I put his shoes on his feet he stood up and touched my eyelid and said "Blue".  I said "Yes sweetie that is blue." Then I shut both eyes and he touched them both and said "Blue Miss Barb." He smiled at me and I smiled back at him.  It was just so cute that this little boy was mesmerized by my blue eyeshadow.  An older child whose room I visited briefly so the teacher could use the restroom told me I looked like a farm.  I had to stop and think about that for a second("Do I need to go on a diet?" ) and then I realized she was talking about my hair. I had braids on each side of my head.  I said "Oh, you mean I look like a cowgirl?"  She grinned.  

Times like these I love my job. When children say something funny, or intellectual or they notice something for the first time. It's like, "I was there for that."  Makes me sad though that I am the one who sees it and not the parents. Makes me wonder what I am missing out with my children, not being with them at school like I use to be. 

But this is my life right now.  I know I'm not the only single mother(or parent) out there who is missing out on their children's lives because they have to work to make ends meet.  

This is life.

For now.

It is what it is.

I'm going to get off of here for a bit. I'll be back again I'm sure. 

-"Be the change you wish to see in the world"-

Mahatma Gandhi

Was It Really The Worst Day Ever?

*Wrote this last night, had to proof it before I posted it...good thing I did too*

This had to be the most craziest day ever.

My oldest twin and I were saying to one another how this day was the "worst day ever"( I can think of other "worsts" but we won't go there right now).

I have yet to shower. My hair is sticking to my forehead, despite the fact I have a ponytail thing goin' on here, little strands are annoying me to no end.

My day started out with the usual....French Vanilla coffee of the Folger's variety and a few Oreos; a little bit o' Papa Pear on Facebook and some news updates on CNN and weather from the Weather Channel as there were storms all around here.    Decided I was going to clean my daughter's and sons rooms(with their help of course) and let me say it was like a tornado ripped through both the rooms.  I'm not kidding.  It was bad in there.

We begin the cleaning adventure and I noticed a line of ants along the baseboard from my daughter's room starting in her closet going to her brothers' adjoining room next door. GREAT!  SWELL! What other fun things will await me on this dismal Saturday morning? Never, ever ask that question....EVERRRRRRRR! So I realized instead of this being a one day weekend cleaning spree, it was turning into the 3 day cleaning spree/ant battle that I hadn't had since the beginning of summer. I thought we were rid of these wretched little piss ants(ha ha get it, piss ants?? Bad play on words.... huh?..yeah...). 

I wanted to just pour a whole gallon of bleach on those smarmy little bastards and light a match.  Okay not really, I'm not Bruce Willis or Denzel Washington, but I was really pissed off when I saw them.

My daughter and I began the daunting task of getting all her clothes she had stuffed in her crates and under blankets out of the closet, away from the infestation and I had laundry up to my ears by the time we were done. She had dolls with broken arms, papers upon papers strewn in piles everywhere all the way to her Ariel vanity set. She had clothes she never wore, and clothes that were too small, ripped or stained too badly for me to care to wash them.  So we tossed them. It was a good two hour ordeal, and I was glad when we finally finished up in there. 

I also had to hit the grocery store. I needed a few things, one being Gogurt for the kids lunches. Getting the kids ready for a simple ten minute trip to the store took a good twenty minutes. Then the boys started in on each other and I was roasting my ass off in this apartment .  The air never seems to run properly when people are inside the apartment.  It's nice and cool for the birds during the day when we aren't here, but for some reason, by the time the sun sets and we are all relaxing, we are all sweating our asses off around here.

We get in the van and head to the store....HALF AN HOUR LATER....I get my few items I needed and we are leaving and my boys spot the little candy/toy addicts machines and like crazed gamblers in front of a slot machine they are plunking their quarters in, then pacing in front of the machines, deciding which fares better for the eight quarters that aligned the palm of their not so little hands. Other kids are waiting and I am telling them(in a not so quiet inside voice) "Let's go already! I have frozen food in here! There are other kids waiting behind you anyway!"

I also had realized I never did get the damn Gogurts either.  I wasn't about to go back to get them.

Crap.

I finally peel them away and we get into the van and head home.

Their dad decided to purchase them a 100 count pack of Latex gloves. I don't know what the hell 9 year old boys need an entire box of latex gloves for, but that is what they brought to my apartment last night. And as tired as I was after the day I had at work yesterday, it didn't register what he bought them until they started filling them with water in my bathroom sink at 8:00 last night.

This morning, same deal, they had another meeting with the gloves, sink and my bathroom floor. My youngest twin son yells to me "Mom, come quick! Something happened!" I go strolling in there, not wanting to look, and there underneath the cabinet and all over my floor between the toilet and front/side of the cabinet was water.  Not splashes of water, but puddles of water.

I wanted to cry.

Then I called the office, this was at 12:47 and of course nobody was there.

Lunch, I am sure.

Call back at 1:02.
No answer.

Call back at 1:30....
*tries to find my happy place at this point*

By the third call my son had chased down the head maintenance guy in his little maintenance guy cart and I am chasing after my son, phone in hand, to stop him. I see the guy swerve around in the cart and heading back my way. I'm half way between the guy and my apartment and I apologize and tell him I was going to call the office for a work order, and he offers to look since he was here already.

Thank God this guy was nice. He laughed so hard when I asked the boys if they put anything in the pipes and they shrugged and looked like innocent guilty parties. He was so understanding. Thank you maintenance guy.

He leaves and I go out on my front porch.

I'm sitting there and I notice a faint propane like smell permeating my front porch. Lovely. I'm thinking okay, what the hell is that? Gas leak??

Neighbor and her ex are talking and I ask them to see if they smell(is that an oxymoron..."See" if they "smell"?? see, the fumes are getting to me, my brain is going bonkers now) a smell of any gas or propane like smell. Her hubby proceeds to tell me that he has a good nose and he didn't smell a thing.  I on the other hand, with my one nostril barely smelling anything caught a waft of what the kids smelled only they said it was REALLY STRONG MOM, and no offense to my neighbor's ex, but I'm gonna go with my kids and my gut on this one.

So I call the gas company. I tell them I didn't think it was an emergency but I wasn't sure. It didn't have that rotten egg smell but rather a propane like smell. She tells us all the safety measures: exit the building and go to a safe area,  don't light any matches, don't turn on any switches, I had already turned off the A/C, and if imminent danger arises call 911.

Did I really need to share that? Probably not, but might help someone else out should they encounter a gas leak themselves some day, *shrugs*, maybe...maybe not.

So there we were, not only did I not finish any of my housework, it is now close to 4 p.m at this point and I had only gotten half the army of ants terminated, baits placed, and trash taken out. I still had the boys room to do, my bathrooms, my bedroom and vacuum the living room. I hadn't cleaned the bird cage  yet, which was something else on the "to do list" for today.

Sorry birds, we'll clean ya out tomorrow.

We are sitting outside waiting for the gas folk to come, and it starts to sprinkle. Wonderful. My battery on my house phone is just about dead, and my cell is no better. My hair is now plastered to my forehead and my shirt and shorts follow suit.

I was looking really pretty.

Let me say to all you folks out there whose mothers told you "Be sure to wear clean underwear in case of an accident" well, let me add to that list. They should have also told you that you should make sure you pretend your superwoman when the gas guy is on his way and shove everything you own in a cabinet or closet until he leaves. I was mortified.  He asked to come in.  I didn't understand. It turned out the gas leak was from my neighbor's apartment and not mine. I was cleaning like crazy, throwing laundry in the laundry room, using those Clorox wipes to wipe down the toilet and the sink. 

I did the best I could. I kept saying out loud, "Okay dude, just flirt with my nice single neighbor a little longer, so I could fix this place up a bit."

No such luck.

He's knocking on my door and my forehead is dripping with sweat from me running around like a crazed chicken, I wipe the sweat from my brow, take a deep breath and let him in. He asks me again if he can enter my home and I say sure come on in.  He asks to enter my daughter's room and I tell him sure no problem. He kept calling me ma'am and I wanted to tell him "Look dear, I know we'll probably chat a total of 3-5 minutes here, but please don't call me ma'am."

Did I mention he was a nice lookin fella? Probably old enough to be my oldest son's best friend, say 27-32, plus or minus a few years, hard to tell these days.  He could of been older, he kind of looked it around the eyes, but I'm not sure. Plus the fact he kept calling me ma'am. Couldn't be certain he was as young as I thought he was to tell ya the truth.

Speaking of men....That's one thing that scares me about guys and  dating too. Some guys look older than they are, and some look younger.  I don't feel like getting arrested or finding a sugar daddy either.  So yet another reason why I am single and not out there in the dating pool.

Thanks gas fella for helping me bring up this topic in my blog.

Speaking of single and dating....have you all seen the new dating bracelets?  It's for the younger crowd of course, but I think it's a great idea.  Would you wear one?

So, where was I?

I got sidetracked with the dating thingy up there.

Damn gas fumes.

It is now 6:40. I managed to fill the sink with water and dishes. Only tons of cups my kids have used throughout the day and a spoon and a few bowls from some cereal they had for a snack this afternoon. We didn't even really have an actual lunch today. I'm starving and I know they are too. So I need to get off this thing and go make some dinner. It's spaghetti night; garlic bread, spaghetti, salad...yum! Top it off with some melted sprinkle cheese. Delish!


I will also probably have to make more Kool-Aid. I made a whole gallon of it and shared about 3/4 of the gallon with six other kids that are friends of my kids. Then the one little girl, was like a damn addict over here, kept coming in with my daughter, which fine, seconds are okay, I filled them half full, but after the 3rd trip in I told my daughter, "That's it, no more!" and I see that other girl trying to squeeze some out even after I said that.

I'm cracking up thinking about it now.

Kool-aid junkies....

Alrighty then...off I go to make some dinner and MAYBE relax this evening. Boys room will have to wait until tomorrow. I have not the energy nor the time to deal with that disaster. Mop my floor vacuum my living room and call it a day.


I need to go!