Just Random Saturday Ramblings

Okay....

I am getting off to a good start this morning.

I have already paid my utility bills and did some grocery shopping. I am currently eating the sushi I purchased while grocery shopping and am enjoying an ice cold Coca-Cola(I'm a coke addict...in the good way that is) *wink*.

If you must know...I prefer the fountain type Coca-Cola, but I'll take it anyway I can get my Coke, whether that be in a cup from a bottle, can or carafe; I'll even take it from a keg. There you go Coca-Cola another free Ad compliments of me.

Can I get a free case of soda out of that?

Anyway, where was I dammit...???....umm....oh yeah, I am proud of my morning so far. Normally on a Saturday morning, I am still in my jammies, plunked down in front of the TV or my computer here and  barely get moving before 3 p.m.  This is not a lie, this is truth. Because when my kids aren't here, I have nothing to do.

No reason to do anything really.

Or at least that is what my procrastinating brains says to me on most Saturday mornings, despite the fact my sorry ass was up at 6 a.m. 

I actually DO have things to do. Mop, Vacuum, Dust, do laundry, find all the rooms that are inside this messy abode I call home.  However, with no motivation of visitors stopping by at the drop of a hat, or a hot date coming over to pick me up, there is no motivation to make me organize and bother cleaning on a Saturday.  Then I think back to last weekend, and the whole gas fella asking to come inside my place, let's just say it makes a very non-motivated woman become very, very motivated all of a sudden.

A friend of mine called and asked me to babysit. I had to turn her down.  I have so much to do today with very little time to do it. I even missed my kids game because of it, I totally forgot they had a game because they are with their dad. That's how bad things are around this place. I need to get my organizational groove back, and having two kids under the age of 10 will not help me on my quest to do that.  I was actually surprised the word "NO" came out of my mouth, because truth be told, I have a hard time with saying no.  I have been told repeatedly and read self-esteem articles about how once in a while you have to just say "NO".  Normally I feel guilty, like if I say no then I'll never hear from that person again or something, or that I'm being selfish but at this point in my life, if someone lets go of a friendship because of that, I'm guessing they probably weren't much  of a friend to begin with anyway.  And if I don't take care of my needs first(mental/physical well-being) then I won't be much help to anyone including my own kids or any other kids for that matter.

She is a good friend though, and we continued chatting after I had to turn down her request. Most people would be like "Well, gotta run, thanks anyways." Click.

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Just got off the phone with a dear friend of mine. We talked for three hours. We would have talked longer I'm sure, but our batteries on our phones were both dying. We hadn't chatted in ages. But you'd of never guessed it by our time spent catching up on her health, her job, her health at her job, my health,  my job, religion, kids and their lack of respect these days, a friend of ours from the past and a few other topics that came up. I managed to finish my dishes while we talked and she managed to get her grocery list to her boyfriend who called twice during our recapping of the month's events in our lives.

I keep having these deja vu moments. They are driving me crazy. I have them quite frequently at work, more so there than here lately. What is deja vu anyway? I mean, what causes it to happen?

I'm thinking of writing a blog post that was discussed during my conversation with my friend. Thing is though, it's very controversial and might ruffle some feathers. However, since this is my blog, my "front porch" I suppose I have a right to speak freely about things that irk, astonish or amaze me from time to time. I really do try to keep the atmosphere around here humorous.  But even when I'd talk to my friend back in Indiana on her front porch, we didn't always talk about funny things. 

So yes, I think that's what I'm going to do. 

This blog is rather blah anyway. However, I will share a little anecdote from work yesterday to make you smile a bit.

I was taking care of one of the little boys at work.  As I put his shoes on his feet he stood up and touched my eyelid and said "Blue".  I said "Yes sweetie that is blue." Then I shut both eyes and he touched them both and said "Blue Miss Barb." He smiled at me and I smiled back at him.  It was just so cute that this little boy was mesmerized by my blue eyeshadow.  An older child whose room I visited briefly so the teacher could use the restroom told me I looked like a farm.  I had to stop and think about that for a second("Do I need to go on a diet?" ) and then I realized she was talking about my hair. I had braids on each side of my head.  I said "Oh, you mean I look like a cowgirl?"  She grinned.  

Times like these I love my job. When children say something funny, or intellectual or they notice something for the first time. It's like, "I was there for that."  Makes me sad though that I am the one who sees it and not the parents. Makes me wonder what I am missing out with my children, not being with them at school like I use to be. 

But this is my life right now.  I know I'm not the only single mother(or parent) out there who is missing out on their children's lives because they have to work to make ends meet.  

This is life.

For now.

It is what it is.

I'm going to get off of here for a bit. I'll be back again I'm sure. 

-"Be the change you wish to see in the world"-

Mahatma Gandhi