A Little Bit of This and That

It's been several days since I've had a cup of coffee.

I had the most massive headache yesterday and I'm not quite sure if it was the lack of coffee, the time change, Mother Nature making a visit...or all of the above that contributed to the pounding, piercing, feeling like my head is going to explode feeling I had all day at work.

It's finally gone.

I went to bed last night at 7:30.

God I feel old.

My cousin is in town this week. I just found out today via a text from his niece, who is also my best friend in the whole wide world. I'd love to meet up with him but I have a feeling that won't happen. I'm too broke to go anywhere, but I am so lonely, company would be nice, even if he just stopped by to say hello, have a soda and run.  I miss my family. So, any family that visits this pithole of a city I live in are always welcome with a smile.

I'm really having a crappy week.

But I'm trying to keep my blog posts somewhat happy or non-drama related, so I shall just say that even though my week was crappy my coffee was on sale for 5.49 and also the Hershey bar with Almonds I already consumed, so that made my day.

The weather is getting very hot, very quickly.  It's only a matter of time before my van craps out on me. Yeah I said that...crap....that's a word my kids think is a bad word. I don't know how many times my daughter especially will say "Mommy, JJ said the 'C' word"...thinking it's something else I will say, "what word is that?" And she will whisper to me "Crap".

"Oh," and I look at her with all seriousness then proceed to tell him, "That's not nice." Of course within a matter of days or minutes he'll say it again.

*shrugs*

I'm leaving this pit hole for a week soon. I don't want to come back here, and if it wasn't for the fact I have kids here that need me, I'd just stay back in Chicago. I miss home so bad, I will close my eyes sometimes and just picture all the memories I had when I lived there. I pretend I am sleeping on my mom's couch near the family room stairs. Or I will pretend I am in my son's room watching him play video games.  Then I wake up, look out the window and see the foul-mouthed teens and adults outside and hear the sirens and what may be gun shots on occasion and I remember just where the hell I am really at.

Anyway, I think I need this vacation. I need to go back home. I want so badly to hold my granddaughter. I want to hug my boys(my oldest who is now 21 thank you), and my 18 yr old who will soon be going to college. My how times flies.

I'm going to hug my parents and any other people I miss who I haven't seen in years. I may frighten them because in all honesty I don't want to let them go.

I have a BFF who lives back there. She is the only person who calls me on a regular basis. We check in with one another all the time. I miss her.  We laugh so hard sometimes, and cry on other times. Gee, if only I could win the lottery. Or marry a rich guy...no scratch that....meet a guy who is just looking for a nice woman with tons of kids and he'd like to help the woman get a new vehicle and send her and her kids to see her family every so often. Or he could just find that woman(me) a job that pays her enough to be self-sufficient and never have to depend on anyone ever again.
Because marriage, or even dating isn't even in my life's plan at this point. I've done both, and they scare me completely.

Men in general scare me.

It's 9:17 now. I am close to bed time for me here. I just don't want to wake up soon, because that means I have to go to work. To a job I once loved, but no longer do. Blah.

My daughter is with her father this week. She called to say good night and tell me she had a bad day. It was a bad day because she said "the boys kept fighting because dad told them to do their homework and they were fighting the whole time." Oh the drama. Poor kid. She just wants some peace like I do. I told her I was sorry she had a bad day. Then she said she loved me and good night. Five minute phone call. I love those.

Since I have nothing more to say I guess I will go.

Not like anyone is really reading this anyway.

Helllloooooooooooooooooooooooooooo...........is there anybody therrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre????............

*This scene from The Grinch comes to mind* 










This is me.  I literally crack up watching this.

I feel like the Grinch lately. Although I don't want to steal anything, I find myself talking to(and answering) myself a lot more lately.

Yep, it's boredom I suppose.

Anyway, heading to bed.

Unless some other ideas come to me before I lay my lovely little head down.

To anyone who reads this....have a lovely day/night.

I'll be back later (as my lovely friend Myrtle use to say):
"The Lord Willing and the Creek Don't Rise."